A New Reality

Thursday will mark four weeks since we got home with the little girl Polsgrove. A month. It's cliché to say that it's been a whirlwind and we don't know where the time has gone, but sometimes statements are cliché because there are mountains of truth to them. For the first week, we were just trying to survive, and in many ways we still are. The second week we were dealing with a nasty stomach virus. Now it's not so chaotic, not so stressful. At least it's calmed down for me. I've gone back to work and reconvened a regular weekly schedule. Only now when I come home there's two people I'm looking forward to seeing rather than just one. I know it's different for Anna. She doesn't go back to work for a few weeks, and she is pregnant with our second child. I'm sure this makes the job of being a mother much harder because she is uber tired but she's doing a great job. One thing that has helped both of us is Lucy started sleeping through the night last week, and ithat's been a huge help. It's nice for us to sleep a little bit.

Before we brought Lucy home, there were two things I hated. First, I got tired of people telling me how different my life was going to be. Not because I didn't believe it was true, but because I hated the connotation that always came with it. Mostly we heard "do everything you want to do now, because once that kid comes home it's OVER". Although most people weren't trying to scare us, it was usually no fun hearing from people in that way. Our lives have changed, this is true. But we've made a priority out of trying to do the things we used to do. We've been to movies, created space for each other to go read and relax. It's more difficult to get away, but we prioritize our time away more because we realize how precious it is. And also it allows us to prioritize the time we get to spend with Lucy as well. Once the initial bonding process is over and we start having babysitters, I can't wait to go out with my wife again too. Yes our lives have changed, but it's been for the better. It's harder for us to do the things we used to, but we're still fundamentally the same people. I hope that never changes, even if our schedule is different.

The second thing I hated was when people relentlessly flooded the internet with pictures of their kids. Their Facebook profiles are their kids pictures. You get email updates every day. Blogs are filled with pictures. It bothered me so much. It seemed pretentious and self-absorbed. Now i know why those people do it. It's almost impossible not to. When you have an addition to your family, and you have other people who want to be a part of that, you can't help but be absorbed in the brand new moments. Asking a new parent to cool it with all the pics is like asking a 16 year old to stop showing off their driver's license. It's like telling a newly engaged woman to stop showing off her ring. It's such a life changing experience there's no way not to be proud.

Our lives have dramatically changed, so you will pardon me an indulgence for a little while. It'll eventually cool off, I promise.



As you can tell, she likes the swing.



She wore this headband for approximately 4.7 seconds before ripping it off.

Russ

Together at last!

We have been home for one week and are doing great! Every day is full of surprises and not all days have been easy but we are so thankful to be on this journey. Here are a few pictures from our first day in Ethiopia.

After sitting on a plane in Chicago for 2 hours, running through the Istanbul airport, almost missing our plane to Addis, we finally arrived around 1 am that Saturday morning. We then found out that two of our four pieces of luggage did not make it (one made it the night we left to come home, one just came to our house today--TWO WEEKS from when it should have arrived in Ethiopia- thanks Turkish Airlines!). Our friend and driver Yoftahe dropped us off at the guesthouse. We unpacked, got everything settled, and finally went to bed around 3:30 am.




Last night with an empty crib in our room

We woke that morning and called Belay about taking placement. He said he would bring her after lunch. We knew that could be 1 pm or 7 pm. Around 2 pm I decided to lay down and take a nap. As soon as I closed my eyes, I heard Russ saying, "They're here!" We both jumped up and ran outside as they pulled up. We could see her in the backseat, drinking a bottle, with a precious bonnet on. We walked around to the passenger side and there she was...just a smiling. As I took her from the caregiver, I was so nervous of how she would react. She was a little cautious but quickly began smiling and laughing.





We spent the afternoon playing. She showed off her tricks and loved showing us how she could walk (just a few steps without our help).





We ended the day by giving her a bath (she was very unsure of this...but has come to LOVE the water) and then bed. Loved having her fall asleep in my arms!






The day began with an empty crib and ended by us putting OUR DAUGHTER to bed in it. We could not believe that after all this time she was with us to stay!

It has been quite a whirlwind since that day two weeks ago. We have so much to share about her, life, adoption, etc. but we are all still adjusting to our new life. I will say there have been difficult parts of the past two weeks (for her and us) but we are so thankful for God's continued faithfulness. We are exhausted but so in love and are truly amazed by this little ball of energy. We are so lucky to get to be a part of her life. Can't wait to share more!

Coming Home

So sorry we have not had a chance to update! We have been busy here with the sweetest, cutest, funniest, MOST ACTIVE 13 month old I know! She has done so well and we cannot wait to get her home. We fly out in 5 hours and land in Memphis Thursday night at 6:50! Can't wait to see friends and family that have loved us and her for so long!

My heart is at peace for the first time since October 2007-- when we knew we were to adopt a baby girl. It has been a wild and crazy journey...one that has taken longer than I would have liked...but being on this side I can say God is good and IT WAS WORTH IT!

She has adjusted well... but pray for our long flight. Hoping she does well! Can't wait to update from home :)

Anna

It's a Boy!!!!

We are so excited!! Lucy will be having a little brother in December!! Russ has been saying it was a boy and he was right!! Love that God revealed that to him so long ago. I cried just watching him as we heard the sonographer say it was a boy. Precious, precious moment!

We celebrated with family (and a few close friends) on Thursday night!










We then celebrated with a few friends tonight!








What a GREAT weekend!!!! As I lay here typing, this baby boy is moving and squirming. The lady doing the ultrasound went on and on about how active he was. If you know Russ, then it is no surprise to you that we would have an "active" baby ;)

I am now 20 weeks pregnant...which is half-way there!! I cannot believe that. On another celebratory note....our baby girl will be in our arms FOREVER in ONE WEEK!!!! AH!!!!!!!!!

Ethiopia, here we come!

We leave for Ethiopia in just over a week to go pick up our girl!! We are ecstatic!! This has been a long, long journey- one that brings tears to my eyes every time I think about it. We saw Lucy Samrawit's picture for the first time in September. I never would have dreamed it would have taken this long to clear court and embassy. But, it did. I would love to say I have been patient through every trial but that is not the case. Some days I have been filled with peace but then made it through others kicking and screaming.

I will say I have learned so much about God's nature....He has been so faithful during this time. I haven't understood every twist and turn or delay but I can say His promises are true. This adoption journey has brought on a whole new meaning to "lean not on your own understanding" and we have totally had to rely on His truths.

We are in a state of thankfulness right now. Tomorrow we find out if Baby #2 is a boy or girl. 1 week later we leave for Ethiopia. 1 week later we arrive back in the United States with one of the most precious gifts we have ever been given.

Please continue to pray for others still waiting to pass court and embassy. There are lots of mountains that are having to be overcome. We know God can level the mountains, break down the bars, make the rough places smooth, and make the crooked places straight. Please join us in praying that for these sweet families and precious children.

Thanks for loving us for the past two years we have been on this crazy ride! We are so thankful.

Submitted

We got an email from our amazing social worker Kristin today! We were submitted to the U.S. embassy this morning! We now wait 3-5 days (or a little longer) to see if they approve us or need more paperwork. Hopefully, they will approve us and then give us a travel date. We hear (not sure if it is true or not) that embassy dates are currently 3 weeks out. So, we shall see. I know one thing....Russ and I will be on the first flight out if they will just give us a date soon!! Can't believe we are one step closer.

Praising God for moving and working. His promises are true and we are clinging to that.

Please pray for all of the families that are still waiting. There are many that are still waiting to pass court...some that traveled before us and some that traveled after us. Others are waiting for referrals. These have become dear friends to us and the waiting and not knowing is hard. Also praying for people to be called to adopt from Ethiopia...adoption is not the final solution to orphans in Ethiopia but it is part of the solution for now.

Thanks for being in this with us.

Happy First Birthday Lucy Samrawit!

I must confess...I have been anxious about this day for a while. Knowing that she would not be home to celebrate her first birthday with us has been hard. But, we decided this week we wanted to celebrate and be able to show her JUST HOW SPECIAL she really is...not just to us but to many!

On Saturday, we were in Oxford, MS for a wedding. We were free all day so we ate lunch with friends before the wedding. After eating, The Ward's pull out the sweetest cake! Sawyer, their 2 1/2 year old daughter sings Happy Birthday to Lucy and then they give us the cutest painting and card!





Today we woke up to a new picture of Lucy. Our friend Carrie is in Ethiopia so she went to the guesthouse to sing happy birthday to Lucy and get a picture of her. Such a joy to wake up on her birthday and be able to see exactly what she looked like!!! I knew Carrie was supposed to be sending it so when my eyes popped open at 5:30 am (which they NEVER do), I immediately looked at my phone! Russ and I just laid in bed staring at the pictures. It was one of the best gifts we have ever been given :)




This afternoon we had a few close friends and family over to eat cake. Definitely not the way I had pictured today but it really was a great one! I can't say I didn't shed a few tears but I know we are so close to getting her home. Praise the Lord for that!!!





Blanket made by her Coco (my mom)




We are so thankful for the way people love us. We love that all of our friends and their children have prayed for Lucy for two years. We love that our families simply cannot wait to get her home. Today was truly a day of celebrating her birth.

Lucy, you are one loved little girl! We cannot wait until the day comes when we are together--the day God has had planned since the beginning of time. Happy First Birthday!! We love you so much!

Exciting news!

It has been almost two weeks since our daughter (for the past year in our hearts) LEGALLY became our daughter on paper. We are still awaiting an embassy date. Our agency has to submit our paperwork to the embassy and then the embassy will give us a date. I am praying to be submitted this week or next (REALLY HOPING THIS WEEK)! Once submitted the embassy has to review our case and give us a date. I have seen this happen within days. Praying that is the case for us!!! I would love to be on a plane within the next 2-3 weeks!!! We want to get our sweet girl home and let her have some one-on-one time with us before December.

Why December you ask??

Lucy is going to be a BIG SISTER!!! We are due in December and couldn't be more thrilled. We should hopefully find out if it's a boy or girl in the next few weeks!! We knew God was calling us to adopt our first child and are so excited about this being the next step for growing our family.

It is NEVER boring at the Polsgrove household!!! I will keep you updated on the progress of Lucy and Baby #2!!!

Peace and Chaos

I have a hard time staying focused. It's true. Anyone who's ever talked to me knows this. I sometimes get distracted and you might as well be talking to a wall because I didn't hear what you say. I'm sorry if this has happened to you. I'm working on it. I promise.

The thing is, there are certain things I've always been able to zero in on. They're usually solitary pursuits. Running. Reading. Writing sermons. Even cleaning is easy for me. If I'm alone and I recognize something needs to get done, I can do it pretty efficiently, until recently.

You all know this, but this year has been filled with euphoric highs and devastating lows.

We left to get Lucy, YAY!!!!!
We had to come back without her, oh crap.

It could be just a few weeks, YAY!!!!!
It's been four months, oh crap.

We're going to have a second child, YAY!!!!!!
We're going to have a second child, oh crap.

Throughout all this, one of the things that has been hardest for me has been the few areas of my life where I've always maintained focus have just spilled out everywhere.I constantly feel like I'm trying to reign in 1000 marbles on a glass table. This became evident to me this week when I looked at the calendar and realized I had scheduled myself to be in two places at one time. This is the second time I've done this in a month. When I realized what I had done, I got super depressed. I felt guilty. I felt like a failure. These probably seem like extreme reactions, and they probably are, but when you suddenly find yourself struggling with things that used to come naturally to you, it's unsettling. It's especially frightening when I realize I'm feeling all of these things before my children even arrive.

We feel like we are as ready as we're ever going to be for this new phase of life. It looks like it won't be long before this new phase of life happens, and that's good news. I'm sure when it comes there are days I'll be pining for life before children, but I'm ready for a progression. There are all types of emotions that come with waiting for something you've been longing for. Anticipation and fear and excitement for the unknown can sometimes paralyze you. That's what I think I'm feeling right now. I feel paralyzed and limited because at any moment my reality could change. It's like asking an 8 year old to act normal on Christmas Eve. I'm clearly incapable of going about business as usual.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you group the anticipation of what's to come along with the constant good news/bad news of this year, I can't do anything but get on my knees and pray to God. I keep hearing him say his grace is sufficient. I've read that passage over and over before, but I'm just now knowing what it means. Before I can be ok with having children, I have to understand that Jesus is all I need. He is going to make these things happen, but it all belongs to him. My daughter is not my own, she's his. Our high school students don't belong to me, they belong to him. My wife and family and house don't belong to me. They're his. Christ really is all that you need.

Sometimes the most worthwhile lessons are the hardest to learn.

Russ

She is OURS!!!

We got the call this morning! Lucy Samrawit is officially ours!! We now have to wait to get our embassy date...but praying it won't take too long. We will post more later but we are just so excited!!!!! Praise the Lord!!!!



We cannot wait to get our hands on her!!!!